Sunday, May 6, 2007

Most Helpful Thing

I posted a prayer request on MOMYS when I found out our second twin had died. Right away, Rebekah, one of the MOMYS, emailed and asked if she could send me a book a friend of hers had written about miscarriage. Providentially, the book arrived two days after the miscarriage when I woke up thinking, "I need to write all this down."

Teardrop Diary by Erin McSparron is a journal for your journey in grief and healing. Erin wrote it following her own miscarriage and it is a tender, tasteful, and encouraging help to record your thoughts and feelings. Pages of Erin's poetry and encouragement are alternated with pages for journaling. Journal pages are lined and each is headed with a Bible verse about grief, sorrow, hope, healing, or providence. The verses are incredibly well chosen. Erin's poetry is right on target in hitting the feelings and tenderness of this time. Some are unpolished, or not quite on meter, but I don't think that in anyway lessens their value for helping you to express your feelings.

I felt an urgent need to record everything I could about our brief time with the twins. I especially wanted to record the happy times - the surge of joy I felt when I saw we were expecting twins - how fun it was to tell Hal. I wanted to record the things the Lord did to show me His love and care during our trial - the hymns our church sang the first Sunday after the first twin died - the food and messages everyone sent. I wanted to record what happened physically, so that I could look back at it later and try to understand. I even wanted to record our sorrow and grief, because these memories would be all we had until we met our twins in heaven. This book made all of this easy. Thank you Erin and thank you, Rebekah!

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